#ConcussionProblems

Didn't want to risk it...

Nonononononono. Stop. Your cast is almost off and if you break your arm again it will be another 5 weeks before you can really wash your hair. Stop. This is what I said to myself before I almost went down a technical section on a ride with Wayne. It's all rock and you descend and turn about midway through. I've done the section before, but not with a cast on, and I've seen someone tumble and break their arm going down. I stopped and walked down. Lair O' The Bear, the trail we were on might be my favorite on the front range. It's slightly technical but not overly so that you become frustrated and after a nice little climb up, the trail turns into rollie-pollie-goodness. It's smooth and there is good flow  and it always hits the spot. If you could turn your morning coffee into a trail, it would be this one. It also helped that it was December 3rd, 65 degrees  and I was in shorts and a jersey so I think I was relishing in the fact that it was so delicious out.

This past weekend Wayne and I rode Chimney Gulch, which is a pretty good climb filled with an almost annoying amount of waterbars. As we were coming down I ran into a girl I went to college with, so we had to stop because I rarely see anyone I know from CO on the trail, let along anyone from Holy Cross. We chatted for a bit about biking and other HC related gossip and then continued on our way. Wayne got ahead of me in the last mile or so and there was a split in the trail and I could not remember for the life of me which way we came up. Right looked pretty good so I headed down about half a mile only to have it dead end into some sort of sewage drainage structure which I think I would have remember scaling on the way in so I decided to turn around and take the other path. On my way down the right path there was one waterbar which you go over as you turn right (my weak side). I started going but lost control half way through and dismounted,  I was straddling my bike but by then the rear wheel  had rolled onto the waterbar while the front had rolled onto a rock leaving me on my very tippy-tippy toes (good thing for ballet and going en pointe) trying to not become high centered. Because my hips are so tight and I was on my tip toes I couldn't swing one leg over while holding onto the bike with one hand. I started wabbling forward and my bike began to roll and I started to fall to my left side (the side I always fall on) and saw my casted hand reach out to catch myself and immediately thought of my hair and somehow spun around and fell so that I slid down the trail on my bottom with my bike on top of me.

It might have been the most uncoordinated 15 seconds of my life, and that's really saying something. At this point I was glad I was separated from Wayne and all other human beings. I did only manage to scrap a finger on my left hand so that was a win, but I did come away with a nasty bruise on the inside of my leg.

This off season I want to work on figuring out my nutrition. Mainly because everything I eat can be broken down into 4.5 things. Rice cakes, peanut butter, grapes, red hot blues, and the occasional trail mix. It's not the worst diet (mainly because Molly and Abe feed me at least once a week), but I feel like there is definitely room for improvement. Plus my doctor (and my mom) told me I need to eat more protein and incorporate more iron into my diet. I'm trying to eat a cup of spinach and 1 banana a day. Which the spinach is mainly for the iron, and because it usually makes me integrate some other type of food with it. I eat bananas when I ride and they have a lot of health benefits while being really cheap and you always know what you're getting with a banana, it's always just kind of "uh, that was okay", never "Oh my gosh, that was the best banana of my life". Plus with bananas I figure I can work on my commitment issues, before I would only buy 1 or 2 at a time because I could never commit to eating all the bananas before they go bad. Now I buy a whole hand at a time. This must be what being a grown up is all about.

It's been interesting having my cast on because the crash is so long ago but because I'm wearing it people seem to feel like it's okay to ask what happened, which I've never really understood because what if it's actually a horrible story. I did start to get creative at the end because I got bored telling everyone, "I fell off my bike...3 months ago." Karma is probably going to come back at me for fudging the truth a little bit. I was on a po-go stick and fell into a man hole and got my arm stuck on the way down. Super gross, good thing I passed out from the pain, huh?; I got attacked by a wolf, he bit down on my hand and shook it so hard it snapped my wrist, luckily some hunters were there to get me out of that situation, and because I passed out from the pain I don't remember much;  Downhill unicycling, yah it's a pretty badass sport;  Once you start talking compound fractures and bones sticking out people lose interest really fast. I also had 3 different people, while I was working at the shop, ask my if I broke my wrist skateboarding. I'm not sure how they get skateboarder out of a girl who works at a bike shop, paints her nails, and wears boat shoes but I didn't want to squash their fantasy so I just went with it. And they say I have a TBI?

Those were some fun dreams....

The medicine seems to be steadily working. I have these little epiphany moments when someone will ask me something from a few months or year ago and if I remember I get super excited, so much so that I usually say, "look at my brain working!" I still have my moments, I won't remember custumers that came in the day before. My sleeping is becoming a little more normal I usually only wake up once or twice at night and then early in the morning. The TBI medicine and the melatonin are both known for producing really vivid dreams. Which I finally had to put a note up because I kept forgetting to not watch Law and Order before bed.

There is  a thread on twitter called #concussionproblems, which I thought would be funny but it's severely depressing to read. All they talk about is there headaches and how they can't do anything because they have concussions. Not that I've enjoyed my TBI but some of it's mildly entertaining to just see how my mind wanders and functions in this state because it's nothing I've experience before. If I had a twitter my feed would read like this:

No, ghosts don't live in your house, you forgot to shut the cupboards when you left. #goodthingthefridgeclosesonitsown #concussionproblems

Lost my keys in Downtown Denver, completely sober.
#concussionproblems

Everyday for the past 11 weeks I've forgotten to get my stitches removed, if you see me please remind me.
#concussionproblems

Set car alarm off again to figure out where I was parked.
#concussionproblems

How do I turn the stove on?
#concussionproblems

Can't remember if I took my concussion medication or not, have to count all the pills out.
#concussionproblems

Keep forgetting that I don't really like running so I keep running.
#concussionproblems

Went to a pumpkin carving party....forgot the pumpkin
#concussionproblems

Forgot they took my cast off...only washed my fingers.
#concussionproblems

Meant to send Kara a check 4 weeks ago for a t-shirt, keep forgetting to text her to tell her I haven't.
#concussionproblems

Started looking up health benefits of bananas...ended up learning that 1/6th of the time spent filming Alfred Hitchcocks's Movie Psycho was spent shooting the shower scene.
#howigotthereidon'tknow #concussionproblems



Disclaimer: I did wash my hair while my arm was in a cast but because of it's thick unruly nature it was really hard to "get in there real nice and deep" (name that movie) with only one hand. While I'm thankful for dry shampoo, I'm more thankful for the ability to wash my hair with two hands. It's the little things you miss

Also I don't mean to make fun of the people on twitter or take there concussions lightly but I approach my injuries with humor, mainly because I know I won't be in this state forever, while I have had moments of frustration (losing my keys in dd was not fun) I know that my big healthy brain (you know that one that attracts all the boys to the yard) will be back. One day at a time.