In my meeting with DF this week I read A Psychology of Being, by Maslow which was okay, I wouldn't recommend it as a fun read, and I don't see Oprah adding it to her book list anytime soon, but he brings up some valid points. We talked a lot about what my motivating forces are, because with running they are very different from biking. After my leg injury I've been able to run for a few months but still haven't really gotten into it. Probably because I look like Quasimodo trying to run. My family and friends talked me into signing up for a half marathon, and a full marathon. Now I have a reason to get back to running, and it's a great cross training for biking. But with biking something else is driving me, something internal, but I still haven't figured out what exactly. I'll let you know when I do.
We also talked about the time that I'm devoting to a hobby that I don't exactly have. I mean I say I'm a biker, but how long can you go without actually riding a bike to still be considered a biker? It's like having a baseball team but without a pitcher, you can only do so much. I keep pretending that any day I'm going to get back on the bike so I need to stay ready. Which I am. I'm doing an internship at a bike shop for class credit. And I even got a job, because well all this down time has lead me to finding multiple bikes that I want, so I need a way to support my hobby, as soon as I take it up again.
But I finally figured out why I'm not riding and now I'm able to face it and take it head on, okay well hopefully not head on, because I did just buy a new helmet and would rather not get another concussion. Yes, you read that right I finally went to the bike shop and got one. Well it was more of after my internship at the bike shop I had them help me pick one out. And while they're not paying me, they do give me the employee discount, so basically I will end up paying them for letting me work there. It really wasn't as complicated as I thought it would be. There was one helmet the S-Works Prevail which is currently the BEST helmet on the market for $230 (no mom and dad I did not get that one, so you can breathe) it's the lightest at 200 grams and the most aero-dynamic, tested in the MIT water tanks, which is great and I'm sure it's super aero as long as someones face isn't in it breaking the wind. So in the end I went with the Specialized Propero, it's about 80 grams heavier, but I could just not eat breakfast and get that weight back, so I'm not too worried. I got it because: it has a visor, which is detachable, a place for my pony-tail, and there was a big sticker on the front that said "Now with Reflectivity" meaning no car will miss me now!
So that's where I'm at now- I was planning on going out biking this weekend, but clearly God had other plans as there is too much snow for any trails to really be in good working condition. So maybe hopefully Tuesday or Wednesday before I head to Colorado for spring break.
Part of the Maslow book is talking about the spectrum of safety to growth as a person. "An assured safety permits higher needs and impulses to emerge and grow." I interpret this as given the option I would have chosen not to get hit by a car but unfortunately life doesn't come with a yes or no option (wouldn't it be cool if it did?), I didn't have a choice. Much like parents who want their children to leave the nest, getting hit by a car kicked me out of my safe cocoon and shouted "HAVE FUN! TRY AND LAND ON YOUR FEET." According to Maslow I'm in the period of "growth" which he says that the period of growth is just as important as the end product. I told DF this, and he said maybe I should thank the guy who hit me because I get to realize all these things that would have taken me a lot longer to figure out. I said, "Let's not get carried away and the only time I might think about thanking him is when he hands me a check."
Acknowledging that I'm in this period of growth doesn't exactly make me feel better about falling through the air and hoping to land on my feet, but at least I have one good leg to land on. Ha
K
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